:: Friday, September 27, 2002 ::

Ugh. I feel SOOOO sick. Puah... I've been trying to fight off this phlem filled throat for over a week now and it just got worse. Crappy thing is that Retreat is this weekend!!! nooooo.... I actually missed my first 2 hours of class this whole semester... I'm kinda scared cuz I have no knowledge of embryology. I kept having nightmares of going to school and asking people in my class what I missed and them going on and on about the oodles of information that I just couldn't be there to hear.



I stole this image from Billy's site. Apparently we're not ALLOWED to take shots inside our simulation clinic, but I guess everyone breaks the rules now and then. Yes... this is our simulation clinic, where we find ourselves for 3 hours on Thursday and 3 Hours on Tuesday (NO!!! SMALLVILLE'S ON AT THE SAME TIME!!!). It's really cool working with our manakins. My manakin's name is Mr. Man. Before I operate on him I always ask him if he's comfortable in the position I've put him in. Then I try not to lean my entire weight on his forehead because he's a really nice guy.

What do we do in sim clinic? Well this is for our wonderful course Operative Dentistry, where we learn how to restore teeth using amalgam at this moment. So we're learning out to drill teeth with proper dimensions so that the amalgam will have enough resistance and retention form, while maintaining the remaining tooth structure's resilience. Haha... I needed to read over 120 pages to say that.


Here's another image from Billy's site. I highly recommend you to. In fact... I ORDER you to. Hahahah. But in this image you can see the multitude of tools we use. You see those handpieces, the ones where the dentist uses to put burs in to drill your teeth? They cost some pretty penny. Gotta love those dentaform teeth on the right! Mr. Man has a perfect set of teeth.


Left to Right: Me, Billy, Derek and Jesh.
This was a shot taken by Billy's digi cam at the Canadian Dental Association dinner. Yeah.. we get treated really nice these days... they want us to join their association so they treated us all to this really POSH dinner. Yummers. :) More pics to come once I develop mine!

:: Jesse 1:38 PM

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What a night!

Not only were we treated to the best Korean food ever (by the wonderful talented hands of Ellen Park), it was Jesh and Krista's birthday! Yay.. .all these Asian dental students all under one roof. I found out that this world is even smaller than I thought. Ellen (the one with the oven mittens on) is good friends with Gina Kim from Woburn, who's in Dentistry at U of T now. Jeez... such a small world...

Well we had wonderful Bulgogi, Kalbi, Mondu and some funky bread salad. Luckily I had my SLR handy that night to take some good party footage. I spent this whole afternoon in my darkroom... and now I think I'm a lil light headed from all the chemicals... for your viewing pleasure!!!


From left to right, top to bottom.
Top Left: Ellen and her wondrous cooking skills.
Top Middle: What a wonderful couch... Nancy's on the phone... Jesh always looks at the camera.
Top Right: Asian Possy. Jesh looks constipated.
Middle Left: Jesh chewing away at some crazy Kalbi. Nancy looks on.
Middle Middle: Jesh and Krista... CLICK ON THIS PIC, it's not exactly the same one shown...
Middle Right: Happy Birthday! Jesh 22 Krista 23
Bottom Right: This is the group pic!


From left to right: ZiMing, Krista, Jesh, Nancy
Derek, Ellen and Me.


Happy birthday you two!!!

:: Jesse 7:55 PM

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My first cadaver experience... this morning we looked at sectioned parts of the upper limbs, mainly the shoulder and arm parts. It was interesting, seeing an arm sectioned off, with even parts of the cadaver's chin and chinhair revealed... yucky yucky yucky. Nonetheless, it's something to get used to and over with.

Dentistry has been overwhelming in a few regards. Recently, the discussions in our classes have turned towards ethics and decisions a dentist must make over his/her lifetime. A lot of these decisions tend towards making more money versus doing the most appropriate deed for the patient. All the talk about ferraris and mercedes kinda makes me sick. I realize how difficult it will be after 4 years to remain true to the Lord and walk in his light amongst all the wordly expectations and "possibilities". Though I'm glad I'm not in medicine, for the pressures upon a physician are much higher than that of a dentist.

In regards to ACF, the frosh group is gonna start on Thursday. My expectations? I dunno... ACF nor I have ever done this before. I used to think of a frosh group as not being effective, because of the limitations you place upon the frosh and the rest of the fellowship... but it's only a 7 week group that will hopefully gear the frosh into attending regular cell groups and in the mode of sharing and accountability. We'll just have to wait and see.

Back to school! Yay... first day of clinic!

:: Jesse 10:57 AM

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I've kept quite quiet about this beautiful lady in white with a silly rose on her head. Actually it's kinda hard keeping the joy a secret this long. But nonetheless, probably to her embarassment as well, I'm ready to share a lil about this special someone. Not too much... but just a little. I'm pleased to introduce you to Priscilla Yeung.

She's got a thing for Mini Shredded Wheats... but it's gotta be those limited edition ones with raspberry fruit in them.

She likes the night sky... just as much as I do. Hence her alias, Shooting Star...

She's got a puppy, who's name is Blessing, or in Chinese... Sing Sing. I think she's about 8 weeks old now.

She's got a real desire for the Lord, always striving for more... and I think that's why I adore her so much.

Hah... she's gonna kill me!!!

:: Jesse 1:07 AM

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Ahhhhh.... the wonders of drilling....

Yup! We started drilling! Too bad I couldn't bring in a camera and take pictures of all my fellow classmates and me in greens and scrubs and masks and with all our cool toys and our cool manikins... but life of dentistry is cool. It's amazing how fast time flies when you're having fun drilling and learning about teeth. Mind you, dentistry isn't all about drilling... in fact we learned recently that drilling is the last step to take these days (unlike the past)... it's more of a preventative approach. But nonetheless, did you know that by gargling out water after you brush defeats the purpose of brushing altogether? I've tried leaving the toothpaste in my mouth and it ain't that bad... just don't load your bristles like they show you in the commercials! And floss... if you don't floss... u will have a very horrible future with you 32 inmates.

It's funny... I'm actually paying attention to the teeth of my friends these days... paying attention if they have caries or plaque accumulation, if they floss or brush regularly, or if they don't. I guess those habits will come across. Something interesting yet disappointing came across a few days ago in lecture. Originally I thought it was perfectly fine of a dentist gave a discount or even did some work for free on patients in need or poorer ones, but apparently that's illegal and dentists have to charge all their patients roughly the same for their services... mind you that the dentist still has control over fees to some extent but can't make particular ones...

ACF (fellowship life) is good. We had a wonderful time tonight and the Lord really blessed the singspiration.

:: Jesse 2:03 AM

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Just one more of the group!!!

:: Jesse 5:54 PM

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IT'S BEEN A WHILE...


Wow... that is part of my kit that I'm gonna be using on Thursday... Dentistry is really starting to unravel. It's amazing how detailed you can get talking about just one tooth :) Today we spent nearly 3 hours talking about one tooth. Both left and right maxillary permanent central incisors. Sooner or later this linguo is supposed to be able to roll off my tongue like butter, but as of yet looks like 100 pages of reading might help that a bit. My class is incredible. There are about 56 students, ranging from people finishing just their 2nd year of undergrad to PHDs. Asian percent? I'd say about 1/4, and we're already starting to chill so much together. I'm thankful for all the laughs in between classes, how we walk as a storm from China into the class and are quite the studious bunch.



Western Fair year 2 was quite a rush. In the picture above are just a few of the hunky tall asian guys in my program (heck....). From left to right... Derek Leung, Me... and Billy... as you can see, we're quite beefy don't you think? I think we're still selling tickets.

Western fair was quite fun and hot this year. Last year I went with Rob, Christina and Rob, and we had quite a different experience... it was at night, it was freezing cold, and we found ourselves trying to survive with the heat from our hot chocolates while watching fake N'Sync groups perform. This year, a different group of people, a different time of day (it was boiling!!!)... and we enjoyed the wonderful exhibits of lactating momma pigs and chickens that sat all day and layed eggs. I saw a physiotherapist for a minute at one of the booths and to my horror I found that my left side of my body weighs 28 pounds more than the right!!! Aiya... gotta listen to momma when she tells me to stand straight... "Kay tzik dee ahhh"... .



Piggy: Billy. (they rhyme). Horsey: Derek. Lambchops: Christa.



Wow... this was fun... Derek and I got onto this bungeee jumper and we was doin flips in the air! Look mamma! I can fly! Though it was only for 4 minutes we were dying!!!



Billy and Derek... on the scariest rollercoaster ever.



Christa looking extremely calm... hey... we were the only ones on this rollercoaster!!! This... 4... person... rollercoaster.

:: Jesse 5:47 PM

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Classes have begun. Here I find myself the time to take a lil break from all the anxiety and craziness of the past few days. Everyday it's a consistent meeting of people that I'm supposed to be sharing the next 4 years with. It's quite a feeling of fear, one that is combined with discovering who these people really are and how they might impact who you become. It's both challenging and a struggle to search for deeper conversations among the typical surface chat that normally goes on during these informal sessions. No, I don't really fancy talking over alcohol, and the continuous chatter of undergraduate degrees, asian tendancies and the life in Toronto isn't that stimulating either.

I've been realizing how impatient I am. I think that's why I'm a really bad counsellor for kids, because I don't quite have the patience to go step by step with the kids. Just as with my fellow classmates, how much I long for deeper conversations where I can share the gospel or how the Spirit can flow through me without my own distraction on the topic. I realize that in my own life, I've had to take steps that involved little spurts of growth, but always looking back in retrospect I've wanted to skip those steps and reach full potential... that the necessity for those steps were in fact my own unfaith or lack of trust in my Lord.

What's eventually become of this orientation week is that all the Asians have already clumped into this little group. That's not bad, but I'm afraid that my witness for the rest of the class may have been hampered. It's kinda that safeness and comfort that is found in familiar circumstances. Nonetheless, it's the continual pursuit to know the people in my class over the next 4 years that is more crucial.

Recently I've been overwhelmed by the lack of strength of my flesh. How much I have prepared myself, planned with strategy and care, and executed but only under the ability of my own flesh... and how I find myself always asking God for strength, yet not understanding how to draw upon his strength. It's such an abstract area. It's easy to rely upon God's strength for areas that you have absolutely no control over, like mission trips, unknown roads ahead and enormous struggles... my summer was an example of that and God was glorified in that case. But it's the things that we think we do have control over, such as our understanding of education, relationships, friendships, and day to day living that we find ourselves with the power struggle and failing continuously. I can't pinpoint if it is a struggle with pride, but I can't help but expect myself to do the right thing with all the teachings I've learned thus far. Drawing upon the Lord for strength... I know it entails a great deal of trust in the Lord, because one would have to let go of their abilities and trust in the Lord to accomplish the rest... but to let go and do nothing... no that can't be accomplished...

"Do those things which you have also learned and received and heard and seen in me... and the peace of God shall be with you..." Phil 4:9

that's what gets me... there's a continuous balance of letting go and also doing what he tells us to.

The greatest battle in all of this is the struggle and discouragement when one falls trying to accomplish this balance. Blame can be put against one's self for not putting in enough effort, enough thought or enough care... and then blame can be put on not following the Lord closely or intently enough...

hmmmmmmmm.

:: Jesse 1:08 PM

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